When a supervisor come to me and says, “Josua, great job!” I felt like my body flow that relaxing fluid acid.

A compliment is really important for self-esteem. People doesn’t like compliment, they need it. They want to know if what they’ve done is right. When you give a compliment, you identify that person with your compliment and those compliments will feedback to your relationship with that person.

When you give compliments it is not only about what you said, but your position in the situation. Your status as the compliment giver is actually higher than the receiver. As you give the compliment you lift up the status of the receiver to be same as you. In this situation, you both will be on the top position. That would take the relationship to the ‘top level’. In opposite, when you give critique your position is higher from the receiver. By giving him a critique you’ll lower his status. Get it?

That is why giving compliments is a win-win action. You give a value without losing value. You even show value without actually showing up as a person with higher status. The funny thing is, you don’t have to be in the higher position to give compliment, such as the boss or the supervisor. You could say simple compliment like “Boss, you look really sharp today!” Now you both could be the boss. No, of course I’m kidding about that.

One advice though, I don’t recommend to give compliments based on nothing. You have to observe the person first. Don’t just say “Good work” without seeing how your colleague working. A compliment has to be rewarding. The receiver should understand and realize their situation whether they worthy to accept a compliment.

Now let’s form a simple, yet meaningful compliment.

Take one topic: A work or job, result, house, smile, appearance.

Mix it with: ‘looks’, ‘are’

Intensify it with: ‘really’, ‘very’, ‘surprisingly’

And end it with: ‘great’, ‘awesome’, ‘beautiful’, ‘meaningful’
Don’t forget to use unique word like: ‘charming’, ‘sharp’

The result would be like this:

You’ve done a great job!
The results are awesome.
Your house looks amazing.
Your smile seems very charming.

Give the compliment sincerely, do it because you want to. Because it will affect your relationship with that person. Don’t be so cheap about compliment. Your compliment is really worthy, so you have to give it to a worthy person in the right situation.

Happy complimenting!
Josua

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